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Tuesday, 16 July 2013

I Am Me. . . Not The Girl With Diabetes

Hello cupcakes! How are you all?

We have many reasons to celebrate today! The sun is out, the sky is clear, and we're alive. Yep. We are alive.

Those of you who don't me personally don't know this, but I have Type 1 Diabetes. I have had it for 12 and a half years now and, I'm not going to lie, at times it has wrecked my life. But I now have an Insulin Pump called Patrick. I decided that since the pump would be my life partner for the rest of my life, he needed a name. So I graced him with the name 'Patrick', kind of named after Patrick Star from SpongeBob. But I call him Patrizio when I'm feeling posh and/or Italian. He's been amazing in keeping my blood sugars under control. And to be honest, it beats injecting 4-8 times a day! No more bruises!

Just so you know, Type 1 Diabetes is completely different to Type 2. Whereas Type 2 is diet and obesity related, Type 1 is not. It is to do with a virus and genetics. There's nothing you can do to prevent it or cure it. Anyway, I've had Patrick for 18 months now and things were going perfectly. Then I had a bad blip, and now things are back to normal again and seem to be going smoothly.

However, I received some pretty startling news last Thursday when I went to see my Diabetes Consultant. My kidneys are leaking. So I seem to have the onset of Diabetic Nephropathy (or Kidney Disease). I won't know for sure how far along I am until my test results come back. However, this pretty much made my world come crashing down for a few days. Wow, how deep does that sound?! But it's how I felt, truth be told.

So I wallowed in the fact that 'leaky kidneys' was yet another thing to add to the list of things wrong with me. I felt sorry for myself and cried lots. And I was such a miserable person, which is very unlike me. But then realisation struck. . .

I am alive. I have access to medical care that isn't available to many people in other countries. I have a good, supportive family and amazing friends. My heart is still beating. What I have isn't terminal. I don't have Cancer. I don't have anything even close to that! I'm young. And I'm going to fight this 'til the end.

Don't get me wrong, I needed to wallow in my issues for a while. I needed to be treated delicately and I needed to feel sorry for myself for a few days. But that's it. That's all I really needed to do to snap back out of it. Us humans, we moan about so much. We worry about things that aren't even worth worrying about. We think our problems are the worst in the world. How wrong we are though.

There is always, always, someone going through so much worse than we are. I don't find that thought comforting at all. But it makes me look at my own issues in a different light and it helps me to put my own issues into perspective.

So even though I thought I was getting better but I'm evidently not, I'm not going to let this affect me too much. I mean, I'm going to try and live a healthier lifestyle which is beneficial regardless. But I'm not going to let this mess with my head too much. Whatever happens, happens. As long as I am surrounded by the people I love and cherish and am made to laugh more than I could possibly handle, well, I'll be happy =)

This brings me to the reason behind the title for this post. I want all my friends to know who I am. I want to be known for my personality: my weirdness, craziness, utter hilariousness ;) and just the girl who gets so excited over stupid things (sometimes I don't even know why I'm excited. Think of the whole "I'm so excited! Are you excited? Because I'm soooooo excited but I don't know why!" scenario). And the girl who talks so much that she actually gets out of breath. I kid you not. It's happened on numerous occasions. Especially when it comes to meeting people I don't know. I have two extremes; either I go mute or I talk wayyyy too much.

But anyway, I digress again. So I want to be known for all that. I don't want to be known as the girl with diabetes, bad health, ketones(!), kidney issues, and the like. Because that's not me. Its just stuff that's been pinned on me involuntarily.

So there. I feel better now I've got that off my chest. It's amazing how much writing can help clear your head.

Anyway, I hope you've kind of enjoyed this post. I apologise profusely for the intense 'emo' undertones. But yeah, have a good day people! Hope you're enjoying the sun as much as I am!!

Keep smiling folks!

Ditzy xXx

2 comments:

  1. As a friend who loves and cares for u. Well done. I will always cherish and love u for who u are

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    1. Awwwww Chiberwinkles!!! I love you sis!! Thank you so much ='') You guys mean so much to me <3 xxxx

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