Friday 20 December 2013

Heartbroken Anonymous

'Heartbreak' 

It's a horrible word. It isn't a nice sounding word that describes something awful. It actually sounds bad. It's just horrible all over.

People say that heartbreak happens to older people. It's not something that kids can feel, neither is it something that teens go through. I mean sure, teens may think they've been heartbroken, but they couldn't have been really. But ladies and gents, that view is wrong. So very wrong. 

Toddlers, children, teens and adults feel heartbreak. Sure, it may be for different reasons. Obviously kids won't feel heartbreak due to a romantic relationship gone wrong. But abandonment, hate, neglect, shame. . . these are all things that can cause heartbreak. It's not all romanticised. 

Some people go through heartache and everyone knows about it. An unfaithful partner, a break up, being neglected, being abandoned, being mistreated. Lot's of people can find out about it. They can offer help and support. But that doesn't always happens. The whole world could know about it but it doesn't mean that you'll get any help to get through it. You're left to fight through it, alone. 

Then there are others. Others who go through the pain of heartache. And no one knows. No one ever finds out. No one ever will. That way no one can help. And you're left struggling, fighting this pain. Alone. You're breaking inside. And you want to literally tear your heart out because it just hurts. So much. You don't tell anyone. It's not because you don't trust them. You just don't want to reveal your weaknesses, your vulnerability, and the pure ridiculousness of it all. Because it's a stupid situation. You shouldn't be so hurt by it. It shouldn't affect you. But it does. And there is nothing you can do about it except ride it out and try to stop it from eating at you inside.

This happens way too much. Why do we give our hearts out to people who don't want it? Why does this always happen?

I'm sorry. I know this is a mega depressing post. But I can't help it. Like I said, writing is my therapy. Or maybe it's purely down to the fact that I have Beyonce's If I Were A Boy on repeat. You decide.

It's so important to keep in mind though, our reason to smile is just around the corner if we can't find it at present. Like for me, one day, I'll find that guy who completes me. The one that accepts my heart willingly. The one who makes me laugh until my insides hurt and then some. The one that shares my love of food. The one who accepts me for me, because let me tell you now, there's a lot of me to have to accept ;) Just the one who loves me as much as I love him. The one that makes me happier than anyone has ever been able to do before. Waiting is one of the hardest things though isn't it? Not knowing when it'll happen. But anyway, my time will come some day. I know it will. 

But we get down right? Sometimes, someone or something can hurt us so bad and we have to suffer in silence for a bit. We will get through it but we can't be strong all the time.

All I'm saying is, sometimes, we just have to stop pretending. Because it's tiring.

Ditzy xXx

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